Folds - Mistake Report

I haven't been here in so long... I missed my little HSBCI. Well, here I am again, and of course, I post here only when I bake stuff. I baked two things recently (of which I can remember, of course).

On Tuesday I baked a cake that everyone loves, called Everyday Chocolate Cake. And today, I baked a cowpoo cake.

You read correctly - cowpoo.

I have no idea why I keep calling it that. It was from this book called Chocolate and Baking. It's on page 52. It's called Chocolate Walnut Cake. It totally failed! I had the correct ingredients, did everything properly. I even thought I did the folding correctly -  apparently, I did not. Folding was all that messed the cake up. My brother called it a sponge that'd been dried out for a long time. My mum didn't want to finish the last bits because it tasted nasty. (And actually, it does.)

The frosting was pretty nasty too. I guess 'cause I beat it on high speed last minute because there were large butter chunks in there. Hehe.

Here's the recipe. If you make it and it turns out perfectly, I'll kill you and ask you for your secrets and pictures, if you took any.

Chocolate Walnut Cake from Chocolate & Baking, page 52

4 eggs
1/2 cup superfine sugar
1 cup all-purpose flour
1 tbsp unsweetened cocoa
1 tbsp butter, melted
2 3/4 ounces dark chocolate, melted
1 1/4 cups finely chopped walnuts

Frosting:
2 3/4 ounces dark chocolate
1/2 cup butter
1 1/4 cups confectioners' sugar
2 tbsp milk
walnut halves, to decorate

Method:
1. Grease a deep 7-inch round cake pan and line the base. Place the eggs and superifne sugar in a mixing bowl and beat with an electric mixer for 10 minutes, or until the mixture is light and foamy and the beater leaves a trail that lasts a few seconds when lifted.
2. Sift together the flour and unsweetened cocoa and fold in with a metal spoon or spatula. Fold in the melted butter and chocolate, and the chopped walnuts. Pour into the prepared pan and bake in a preheated oven at 325 degrees F for 30-35 minutes, or until springy to the touch.
3. Cool the cake in the pan for 5 minutes, then transfer to a wire rack to cool completely. Cut the cold cake into 2 layers.
4. To make the frosting, melt the dark chocolate and let cool slightly. Beat together the butter, confectioners' sugar, a milk in a bowl until the mixture is pale and fluffy. Beat in the melted chocolate.
5. Sandwich the 2 cake layers with some of the frosting and then transfer to a serving plate. Spread the remaining frosting over the top of the cake with a spatula, swirling it slightly as you do so to make a pattern. Decorate with the walnut halves and serve.

Good luck!!

N

This, That, and the Other, a Post Posted 30 Days Later :D

HI! I'm BACK! And I'm SORRY I haven't been UPDATING because I've been BUSY (yeah right) and I DON'T know WHY I'm CAPITALIZING EVERY OTHER WORD but I'd BETTER get to the POINT.

In my absence I baked a lot of things. There was this cake I made for Eid, and then these checkerboard cookies, and then these chocolate chip cookies that had too much sugar.

I feel like I did more than that. Maybe I did. I need to keep up on life updates in my virtual diary. The last time I updated my actual real book diary was 8 days ago. And I just went back to my blog called 'The Heart of a Human' and there are stuff I said about this place that I don't mean now. When I make friends in a new place, I automatically like that place. -_- Which is dumb considering all my friends can't live in the same place I am. So, correction - I like this place, but hate the house. Which is okay since I won't be staying in it for long, iA. I also used to hate the masjid/school because it didn't have any softie carpets like the one in my previous home. But, it's a school, man. Schools aren't comfy, although they should be. That sounds wrong, coming from a homeschooler. But where was I, anyway?

Oh yeah. I was going to talk about life updates. My sister and I recently began going to the sister gathering for youth every Saturday after Maghrib. We began around a month ago, and on the second week I made friends with my Quran classmates. The epic ones. And, tomorrow I have a competition that takes away my chance of going to archery class. And calligraphy class. (But that's okay since calligraphy isn't as exciting as archery.)

SO! Where was I - oh. Darn. The stuff I made. Yeah. This is a baking blog. I always get carried away when I write, and then when I take a break, I look at the post's title and then I remember what I was supposed to write about. So, without further useless paragraphs, here we go!

The Cake I Made on Eid
I don't think most of you know what Eid is (or what most of the words in this post are), but that doesn't matter because this is a cake we are talking about. Let's all go to the storyteller room.

'Twas the night before Eid Al-Adha,

when all 'round the Ka'bah,

all Muslims were praying,

remembering Allah.

Okay, actually, I'm not sure if the hujjaaj were going around the Ka'bah at the time. I don't know a lot about Hajj. #shameonme But, anyhow... I had burnt myself upon taking the cakes out of the oven (I always remember the times I cook through my injuries), and as they were cooling on the table, I was preparing to make the frosting. It only needed a stick of butter and a cup of powdered sugar. I blended those two together, but they only resulted in a bunch of tiny white balls of butter and sugar. I stared at them and I thought, "Hey, nice excuse for frosting." Just kidding. I read the recipe again and recalled that they needed some sort of extract. Namely vanilla extract. We don't use vanilla extract because we don't know what these people put in those bottles. There could be alcohol in them. So if we ever do buy vanilla extract, it's usually from a health/organics store. Anyway, I let the mixer blend again, and I washed my hands and let the excess water drip inside the mixer. Right away it began turning into a very fine icing. One that was somewhat too sweet. Once the icing was completed, it was time to ice the cake, and here I stopped. I always get so nervous when I have to frost or decorate anything, especially if it's something real. Graphics, fine. Deleting is possible. But glue, paper, cake, all that jazz, they're too precious. This paragraph is too long. I asked my sister to help me frost, and of course it took her some time to actually get up and leave the room, because, well, you know, I keep the room clean and she can't take her eyes off of my work. [Just joking] The cake was supposed to be sandwiching the frosting and some raspberry fruit spread. So my sister did the jam first and then she did the frosting, and I did the sandwiching (we should have switched jobs, because she didn't know how much jam to apply, and I can't be trusted holding a cake (or doing anything, rather)). BUT, we ended up with a fabulous cake, and I put it in a cake carrier and stuck that in the fridge. And, after we came back from Eid prayer the next day, we ate the cake. It was cold and hard. I always feel bad for the people who have to deal with the stuff I make because the stuff I make always look horrible, taste worse, and there's either too little or too much of it. Anyway, we finished the cake - hehehe. The end!!

Don't ask me why I/we cut it like that. And yes, it's floating above the rug and the chairs.

The Checkerboard Cookies That Mum Loved
Well, here you go, Mum. The post you've been waiting for. I love it when I get requests for blog posts. I'd probably be a bad YouTuber because I always need suggestions, and when I get them, I never DO 'em (until 30 days later, at least). But when I do them, I do a bad job. -_______-

The recipe was called Chocolate Checkerboard Cookies -- oh my cookies I just remembered something else I baked, yay!! Anyway, the recipe was simple (which is one of the reasons I chose to make it) because it required no sugar. At all. Just a few tablespoons of powdered sugar, and voila!!

I actually have a more important assignment to do that's due in three hours, but I can't leave this post because my memory's awful, and my writing sprees are hard to turn back on. BUT, I'll update this post when I finish the assignment. Hopefully it won't take long, because I'm supposed to write about the most vivid memory I can remember, be it good or bad. And I'm writing about a bad one because, heh. I mean, good stuff, happen to ME? Yeah, huh.

I sound so spoiled. Well, I'll check back when I do! [10:55 AM]

OKAY! GUYS! I finished the writing assignment. [11:47 AM] It was a little hard to figure out where to start because the paragraph should not exceed the length of one page. And as usual, I have a lot to say. If I KNOW what to write about (story from beginning to end), I can get it done in a much faster time than how I would get a novel done. -_- Ah, me.

Well, now that I'm here again, the story can begin again. I mean, it can proceed. Because I'm not sure you guys would want me to start from the beginning again.

As I was saying before the assignment called me, the recipe required no sugar. The dough was a little too fragile, 'cause it broke easy. I can usually tell what the texture of a cookie will be like if I know what the dough/batter feels like. Most of the time I'm right. The dough for this recipe was fragile, as I stated earlier, and me prediction was correct. The cookies BROKE. But they always do when I'm in charge. I don't know if you guys have watched my video on BROWN SUGAR COOKIES, but I hope you haven't. In that video, I smashed a cookie.

"She smashed a cookie." -My cameraman/My brother-

Again, I hope you haven't seen that video. It is the worst way of torture for me. (I don't like using that word. Just sayin')

I had to color one half of the dough, then freeze both doughs in the fridge for IDK how long. I have to check the recipe. But my mom's around so if I get off this chair she might steal the computer from me. And the -- TMI.

*waits for mum to leave the scene*

I did an awesome ninja move over the loveseat and grabbed the book off the shelf.

OKAY. I ended up switching computers because of... well, you know.

Anyway, I have to study a million things for tomorrow's competition. AGH! One more thing to add to my growing list of things I fail at...

Studying, Thing #1246.

Me, study? Ahahahaha. Look, this is what I have to study.

10th Grade
1)  IQRA Seven Surahs Book – Memorize Surah Rahman (Ayahs 1-25), meaning and tafseer by Abdul Nasir
2) When the Moon Split by Safi-ur-Rahman Al-Mubarakpuri – pages 163-320
3) Who gets Allah’s Mercy video lecture by Nouman Ali Khan
4) Diseases of the heart and their cures by Ibn Taymiyyah – Chapter 1

This is insanity!!

I can't win. Wish me luck though - I mean, pray for me. Halal-ly.

Back to the point! I freezed both doughs in the fridge for 1/2 an hour - wait, freezed isn't a word? I thought it was, for a moment. For real. Anyway, after that 30 minutes, I had to roll out the doughs into a rectangle, then stick them together with something called egg wash. I was too lazy to make it *hem hem* so I stuck them together just like dat. Then I cut the dough in half lengthwise, and flipped one half over to make a checkerboard design. I was supposed to use egg wash for that part too, but I didn't, which is probably why the cookies broke. Lol. Anyway, I sliced beautiful little checkerboards and baked them for ten minutes. They were delicioso. They just lacked in sugar.

And in strength. *watches cookie break*

The Cookies I Invented Myself, Merging One Recipe with Another
I was rather proud of these but not proud enough. I wish I had pictures, but I was home alone at the time and my camera is broke. (It's been broke since September 2013.)

I used a recipe from YouTube, which I will link later. The other recipe I used was from my blog, If You're Hungry and You Know It. (Adorable name, right?)

My leg hurts.

These I named PB and J cookies. I simply took the Cool Sugar Cookies recipe and flavored/colored one half of dough with one giant spoon of creamy peanut butter, and the other half with some jelly. The jelly was really hard and annoying to flavor. The jelly made the dough limp and more breakable, and sticky. I added a lot of flour, but the dough didn't change at all. So I gave up and dealt with it how it was. When I came to the part where I had to roll up the doughs into a log, the jelly dough BROKE, and I almost screamed, but I kept rolling because I had confidence.

They resulted pretty well, but they didn't taste that good. At least that's what I thought. I'm only one person.

The Cookies I Shared with One of My Classmates (And Gave Me a Rather Chronic Burn)
This recipe I took from the internet. We had chocolate chips and I wanted to make chocolate chip cookies, but there were so many recipes we had, and I was looking for a simple one. So I typed up 'simple chocolate chip cookie recipe' on Google search, and I found THIS.

My mistake in this recipe was that I used dark brown sugar. And, telling from the color and texture and taste of it, dark brown sugar melts much more easily than light brown, therefore it makes batter runny, and the cookies spread real flat out. My guess was right. (Shameful Note: We actually did have the correct type of brown sugar, but I was kind of rushing... as always -_-) --

I had one cup of chocolate hazelnut milk for breakfast, and that's all. Just saying. I better eat a lunch fit to feed four children. 

-- I burnt myself real bad on the middle and pointer finger of my left hand. And, of course, it was because I was rushing.

Okay. WHY WAS I RUSHING ANYWAY?! Because, that day was a busy one. I had to go to Quran class at 3 instead of 5 because I had a class that my mom made me go to that started at 7 and the teachers preferred us to go at 6:45 because of Maghrib time (yes they're Muslim) and I had rocks class, literature class, and history class.

I had to apply three ice cubes wrapped in tissue to my fingers. The pointer finger healed first, but the middle finger burn was worse. I didn't keep track of the healing, but it's fine right now.

I packed up some cookies to take to the masjid for my sister. (And a little extra for my Quran class friends lol.) I sat at the desk where nobody could see the contents of and put the ziploc bag of cookies inside. Then, my friends came, and one sat next to me. Near the time I had to leave, she asked me to give her two of the cookies and I was like, "K." I tried to make it as subtle as possible. Though I didn't actually have to because we had a sub teacher.

--

Thanks for reading! If there's something you actually want me to make, I'll do so! But I'm not a pro. (Pros don't burn themselves -_-) So nothing too complicated.

Keep on baking! Or doing whatever you're best at! Or doing whatever you enjoy most!

N

[1:01 PM]

One Bowl Brownies

Here is a review on One Bowl brownies, something I made yesterday that kind of turned out to be more like cake. :S I don't know what went wrong, but I have a guess. Anyway, before I get started on that mistake, I'm going to straighten everything out by showing you the recipe to One Bowl brownies.

1 pkg.  (4 oz.) BAKER'S Unsweetened Chocolate

3/4 cup butter or margarine

2 cups  sugar

3 eggs

1 tsp. vanilla

1 cup flour

1 cup coarsely chopped PLANTERS Pecans

So first I was supposed to put the butter and chocolate in a huge microwaveable bowl, and then put everything else in there and stir, and put everything in the baking pan from there. But, I didn't. I don't know why. Anyway, after I heated up the butter and chocolate, I poured them on the sugar right away. I think that's what caused the brownies to not taste or look like brownies. I should have let the chocolate cool. The brownies came out as light brown and tasted like cake. Other than that, they were fine.

N

Budderrrr

There was a trash truck outside being loud.

Anyway, we finally bought butter, so I am going to bake something today, inshaAllah. I know this may be a bad decision, but I am going to make that caramel turtle thingy. 1. because I want to 2. because it's a holiday today and 3. because it may expire soon. :3

*some hours later*

The caramel turtle thingy is in the oven! LOL! I don't know why that's funny but I just made it funny so that means y'all have to laugh. Dem uncooked brownies looked really good. However I have a complaint to make. The batter tasted NASTY. I mean, not as yum-headed as usual brownie batter. And not as thick. So that's why you should never ever use box mixes. They're fake, and you guys know how I hate fake things. #makeup

Or do you.

But anyhow.

The timer says 14 more minutes. Yaa-haa!

Do you guys think I'm weird?

I'll be back.

(3:54 pm)

Oh I forgot to say. The mix didn't even NEED butter.

(3:54 pm)

(4:11 pm)

They're done! And they smell awesome! And they're not eatable yet. T_T

After they cool down and we eat some I'll have some pictures up here. They only took half an hour to bake.

*4 hours later*

They're finished and my sister wouldn't let me take pictures. I am sorry, guys.

N

[Q&A] I Weigh More Than 100 Cakes

*stares upwards*

What kind of TITLE is that, man? Did somebody get on my computer and write that while I was in the kitchen?! I'm calling my lawyer!

But actually, that title gives me an idea. How much DOES a cake weigh? And do I really weigh more than 100 cakes?

Hey, why does it matter how much a cake weighs, anyway? There is only one cake I know that has something to do with weight, and that's a pound cake. Why are pound cakes called pound cakes?

My guess has always been, "Maybe that's how much they weigh."

Well, that could be everyone else's guess too, but I guessed it first, so, yeah.

Hey, why not write a blog post on why pound cakes are called pound cakes? I'm bored anyway.

Let's turn this into a Q&A post. *sticks on Q&A label* *changes title*

WHY ARE POUND CAKES CALLED SUCH?

I know right? I've always wondered that too. Let's just sit back and wonder why, and watch the world progress in front of us. Here's some lemonade.

-.-

Maybe they are called such because maybe they were invented in England and maybe they were sold for a pound. Could be! *begins to research*

Okay. Here's some information. I'm right!!!!

The original recipe for pound cakes first appeared in English and American cookbooks in the 18th century. The recipe called for a pound of each of the important ingredients. That is why a pound cake is called a pound cake! A pound cake is made from equal parts of butter, sugar, flour, and eggs. The French dudes called this cakes quatre quarts, which means four quarters.

It seems that's all you needed to know, and I've answered your question, so go away. Shoo.

Pound cakes are usually flavored with lemon or vanilla. The British like to add dried fruit and the French like to add chocolate. [The French have a better taste than Brits, lol. Just kidding.]

--

Seems like Q&A is over. Now I have a question to ask, and YOU are required to answer.

Can you make this cake and show me in a blog post, video response, email, or other? Khank yu.

SOURCES:
http://www.cookthink.com/reference/2465/Why_is_it_called_a_pound_cake
http://whatscookingamerica.net/History/Cakes/PoundCake.htm

By the way, thank you to the random person who gave me that rather offensive but interesting title. You deserve a pound cake.

N

Ups and Downs of Measuring

I use measuring cups when baking, because weighing scales are 1. inaccurate and 2. sooooo yesterday. Of course, everything has its disadvantages. Here are the pros and cons of using a weighing scale as opposed to using measuring cups.

Well, first of all, of course, I like to blab about my own experiences before I explain what I get from research. So, I'll take it from here--

Measuring cups are weigh better than a weighing scale any day. (#lamepuns) I mean, they're easy to use. You scoop 'em into the barrel of sugar or whatever and level off the excess with a knife or whatever. Weighing scales however are kind of hard to use, TBH. I was making this Malaysian dessert that had UK measurements and it was hard because 1. it was difficult to get the weight accurate and 2. the scale was BROKEN.

Laugh. Now.

And there's another reason which added to why it was a frustrating experience but it's unessential to this post so if you want to know you can comment for all I care.

I have a say against weighing scales, and no offense to those who are probably #1 fans of weighing scales and have posters of weighing scales in their bedroom, bathroom, and kitchen, and maybe even walk-in closet.

So look here. Weighing scales are those kinds of thingies that require a screen and battery or whatever. Cups are complete plastic/metal/silicone. They don't need any battery. They just require manual use. There are just some things that don't require technology.

Oh my cookies, it's kinda late-ish and I haven't even done any research yet!! Cue research!! Cut rants!!

Hey, I could make a debate about this matter.

Okay, I just did some research and I realized something. We use measuring cups for wet stuff too, occasionally. We use them to measure things like shortening, chocolate chips, and brown sugar. Sometimes measuring shortening can be annoying. Sometimes, when the shortening is almost finished, I stick the giant 1 cup into the container, and all I get is more frustration. Why? 1. the cup's too big and 2. the shortening is in the little nooks and crannies of the container, which are impossible to reach with my type of measuring cup. Using a small spoon and weighing scale would be more efficient in this case. Also, shortening is oily and it sticks together. It doesn't fall apart, like sugar and flour. When the shortening container is full, the scoop is easy, but the amount scooped isn't accurate. You get a cup of shortening with a giant, unnecessary blob on top that you have to scrape off with a knife. It's not much of a problem, but it's pretty inefficient, especially if being on a cooking show is your future life plan. Also, do you ever have your brown sugar in annoying clumps that are hard enough to kill someone? (I am not kidding.) Yeah, well, since they can't be measured accurately using cups, why not use a scale? Those clumps lack perfect composure, but they do have a weight. Clumping doesn't render them completely useless.

That's about it. Any questions, please comment. Also, I will begin baking pretty soon, so you can comment what you'd like me to make, if you want. Simple stuff, though. Nothing like a big fancy frosted cake with strawberries. You can suggest something like...

"Warrior Cats cupcakes!"

*inconspicuous cough*

Thanks for reading, keep on feeding!

N

What To Do Pre-Baking

When I have to start baking something, I'm all confused. I'm like, "Am I supposed to get the stuff out first, or read the recipe first in case I need to prepare anything beforehand, or just stand here being confused without getting anything done?"

The first thing to do is choose a recipe to make. Read through it all before the time you start to bake, in case anything needs to be prepared beforehand. For example, softened butter, room-temp eggs. Let's use this simple brownie recipe as a guideline.
-------------------
BUTTERSCOTCH BROWNIES

Duration: 40 minutes
Yield: 1 dozen

1 cup softened unsalted butter
1 3/4 cups brown sugar
2 eggs
2 1/4 cups flour
1 1/4 cups butterscotch chips

1 square semi-sweet chocolate, melted
Preheat oven to 350 degrees F. Butter and lightly flour a 2” deep rectangular baking pan.
Beat butter with sugar until creamy. Add eggs and beat until fluffy.
Sift flour and fold into batter. Fold in chips.
Scrape batter into pan and smooth evenly. Bake for 25 - 30 minutes or use the toothpick trick.
Let bars cool. Drizzle with melted chocolate and cut into bars.
-------------------

Arright. Where do we start?

I assume most of you know what a yield is, but since the purpose of this blog is to educate, that includes educating all ages, which means educating all levels of knowledge. A yield is not that triangle sign you see on the road, but a yield is the estimated number of servings a recipe will make. This recipe says it can make 1 dozen, or 12, butterscotch brownies. Personally I think that's a tiny number, but that might just be because I have a big family who likes to eat. Including me.

Okay, so what do you think softened butter means? Ain't butter naturally soft? Well, not if you put it in the freezer at a ridiculously cold temperature. Anyhow, softened butter means butter at room temperature. It has to chill for a bit. (Think of it this way: the butter was taken out of its bed and unwrapped of its sleeping garments. Rude much? You need to let it have some alone time to cry its life out. But don't let it cry too much. It wouldn't be useful.) When I soften butter I do it a little late, but this isn't due to any smart techniques I have, because I DON'T have any smart techniques. Since I do it late, I put it in a patch of sunlight, or I heat it up in the microwave for some time. Why am I even saying this though; it isn't helpful.

There is also a reason we use unsalted butter. I don't remember what it is, but it could be this: Salted butter is salty. Its addition to a recipe would call for more sugar. More sugar might change the consistency of the batter or dough, and also it would make your treat less healthy. I mean, it would be naturally unhealthy, but I think you feel me.

Brown sugar not only differs from white sugar in color, but it differs also in the outcome of whatever you're baking. White sugar makes things crispy, but brown sugar makes things yummy and chewy. Well, scratch the yummy. Some people think chewy things are disgusting. I personally think chewy things are delicioso. Unless... #chewygrapes

Eggs have to be at room temperature. The reason why is explained in another post I have, so if you want to know why, look through this blog.

I just realized that I typed all that unnecessary info that has nothing to do with the main point of this post. SO.

If a recipe calls for softened butter [and most of them do], take the butter out beforehand. If the recipe calls for eggs, take those out too.

About five minutes before you want to start the chemistry, measure everything out. The butter should be halfway to ready by then. Measure the flour, sugar, etc. You know the difference between dry and wet ingredients, hopefully. (I'm sorry, I'm not deliberately treating you like you're stupid.) Before you start measuring, you should preheat the oven to its desired temperature.

The rest is simple. You mix so and so together, pour it into a pan, set the timer, and wait.

There you go! With these pre-baking steps, your baking life shall now be completely facilitated with this post, if it were not before. Thank you for reading, happy eating!!

This ice cream is good.

N

Cookies are the Gems of Heaven

You know how you see cheap donuts on sale at the store sometimes and you're like...

And your parents are like...

And you're just like...

ANYWAY, here's a continuation of the post from yesterday. We left off at Filled and Garnished Cookies. Next on the list is... Bar Cookies! I prefer to call them bars. I just like that word. It's so... barzzzzy. I mean, you feel me?

No?

Yes?

Maybe?

A little bit?

#itsokaytofeelsadsometimes
#danieltiger

⚜

BAR

To be honest, I never did know whether to call brownies 'cakes' or 'cookies.' According to my research, (#dorothyann #magicschoolbus) brownies, blondies, and other goodies in that area are cookies shaped like bars. Does that explain why they're so good? hehe

The way bar cookies are made is simple. Just make some nice thick batter, pour it into a square or rectangular pan, and bake it. After the pan is taken out and cooled completely, or maybe not completely if someone's impatient, the contents are cut into little squares, or rectangles if you like to be fancy [and greedy muahahah].

Bar cookies are made another way, too. They aren't made just out of batter. They're sometimes made by pressing ingredients into a pan, and then baked and cooled and cut. I remember watching a cooking show on TV about someone making granola bars. [It was Barefoot Contessa. Rate this post as 'Amazing' if you've seen that show.] So anyway, that Barefoot lady made a rather nasty mixture of oats, honey, dried cranberries, dried apricots, and dates, and she preseed it into a pan. Then she cooked it. It was pretty cool. But if she'd used other ingredients I would have enjoyed the show more. (Considering the fact that I did not like the entire show itself overall.)

I once made butterscotch brownies/bars. The recipe was in that Ultimate Cookie book I showed you in the other post. They turned out WONDERFULLY. #nosarcasm

So, yeah. There you go. The re-bar-kable way bar cookies are made. Actually, lemon bars are a type of bar cookie. First a shortbread crust is made, pressed into a pan, and cooked. Then a lemon custard thing is made, poured over the crust, and cooked again. Then powdered sugar falls from the sky onto the finished product, and there you go. It's like cheesecake!! ^_^

Well that was cheesy.

Are you sitting are your computer/laptop, reading this in this state?

I suggest you go get a cookie or something before your head falls down.

What did the cookie say to the other during a fighting match?

"You're one tough cookie!"

#cheesyjokes

There was once a dude named Graham Crocker who was all about baked goods. Everywhere he went he saw cakes, cookies, donuts, and other things that no doubt make anyone's mouth water. Well, one say he went to the playground. Someone came to him and said, "Hey, you! Want to try the monkey bars?" Graham's eyes lit up. Monkey bars!! Were they a mix of monkey bread and some type of bar? It sounded delicious! He couldn't wait to try it out. "Why, sure!" he said.

#evencheesierjokes

Alright, done. Are you sitting a little straighter now? Good, because I'm about to talk about som'n else, you small-fry.

FRIED

So... wait, did you say FRIED COOKIES?! Who woulda thunka sucha thing bruh.

Don't worry, fried cookies are good. Just.... oily. :D

Fried cookies are primarily made and consumed by Jewish/Polish people. (Not intended to offend anyone!! You can't go wrong with good food!) They are fried dough, usually sprinkled with powdered sugar. Sounds good! Speaking of such, have any of you non-existent blog readers ever eaten a funnel cake or a churro? They're cakes of Dutch origin, made similarly. I've never had a funnel cake, but I've had churros two times that I recall. Last year I had some during a bake sale hosted by me and the Girls Club. At home, my mom was making some, and we were helping. Making churros isn't very easy. But it's kind of fun! So, after all the churros were done, we tried the ones that failed. They were like heaven. Airy, soft, crunchy at first bite. Kudos to whoever thunk up such a goodie!! After we finished all the bad ones, I wanted to have another because they're irresistible, like Flipz pretzels. But my mom said no, they're for the bake sale. I was like

And we sold those heavenly things without much trouble. It was a dollar for two, I think.

NO-BAKE COOKIES

I really think these should not be called cookies. Since they're no-bake, then they're not cookies. They're... fake cookies. Maybe they should be renamed to freezies, or easies, or #easyfreezymakewhenaintnobodygotnotime treats.

Anyhow, what are No-Bakes? D'uh. What they sound like. Cookies that require no baking. These usually don't require eggs or anything intolerable when raw. For example, Rice Krispies treats. All you need is some marshmallows, rise krispy cereal, a fridge, and lots of patience. I actually tried to make one once. But since marshmallows have gelatin in them and I didn't have any halaal marshmallows, I used PEANUT BUTTER!! It's stiff, holds together, and is yummy. I don't remember how it turned out but I ate it.

You don't need a fridge for these. Some no-bakes are completed with time and nothing but time.

This section is short, so how'bout this?

Any of you can easily do this at home. Why not make it for an upcoming event and show me in a video response or blog post? I would be so enchanted.

Phew! Last on the list are Sandwich Cookies!

SANDWICH

I remember a regretful day when I brought homemade Oreos to the masjid [mosque] for a halaqa. Regretful, why? I actually have no idea. Forget what I said. It was just.... a typical Saturday afternoon, where the sky was horrible and gray, and the wind was furious. Me and my sister made....... dun dun dun dun!!

No, we made oreos, not dun dun dun dun.

I think I have the link to the recipe we used, but right now I'm under suspense 'cause something's on the stove. So, later, I'll try to find the link and put it here. By the way, that gray stuff in the first picture is my skirt. Lol that oreo in the first picture at the bottom looks like it's screaming, "YAWL GET OFFA ME!"

Other than that, it looks like it's cackling.

Oh gosh, I just realized how long I've been typing and I haven't even explained what sandwich cookies are yet. Well, it's quite simple. Two cookies separated yet connected by some type of filling. I made ice cream sandwiches once. They were delectably delightfully decadently delicious.

⚜

So it seems we've come to a closing here, since I have told you all about 9 types of cookies. These are basics, but there are many, many more. Too many to count and eat.

If I have said anything incorrect, please let me know.

Thanks!

SOURCES
Types of Cookies
All Types of Cookies
No-Bake Cookies
Oreo Cookie Recipe

Happy eating, thanks for reading! I've gotta check the stove

N

[Edited on 15 Aug 2014, 4:23 PM]

Cookies are the Gems of the Baked Goods Universe

HELLO EVERYBODY!!! I'm out of a two-month-and-four-day hibernation!! Oh my cookies. #imahorriblebloggerlol

Having fun going back to school? Anyone eaten any cake recently? Any muffins, cupcakes, donuts, cookies, cake pops, or chocolate mousses? If you have, then I suggest you go start a diet. I however do not need to do so at all. Since I moved, I haven't had time to bake, and even if I had, I didn't have the proper ingredients. So I think I should be stick-slim by the end of this month.

Just joking.

Buuuuuuuuuuut, some lady gave us this caramel turtle brownie mix!! I have been wanting to make it since she gave it to us, which was July 11. LOL, yeah, I know. What if I make that and take all the credit for measuring everything so precisely?

AHAHAHA.

No. I don't lie.

Not with brownies.

Not with anything that's a baked good. (Scratch burnt sugar cake, I HATE it.)

Anyway, today's post will feature the gems of the baked goods universe, (anyone got a shorter name? lol) or the BGU. Actually, a more accurate name for the BGU would be Heaven. So, drumroll please.

nom nom nom nom nom NOMMMMM

Cookies, the gems of Heaven!!!

Now that we're settled, I can begin talking.

#trollface

There are many different types of cookies. And by different types I most definitely do not mean something like sugar cookies as opposed to chocolate crinkle cookies. No sirree bob. First of all that would take forever. And second of all it would make me hungry. I'm fasting right now, so thinking about chocolate is making me be all like...

As I was saying, or was about to say... I mean different types like the different ways some cookies are made.

• Drop Cookies
• Refrigerator Cookies
• Cutout Cookies
• Shaped/Molded Cookies
• Filled & Garnished Cookies
• Bar Cookies
• Fried Cookies (Yeah, yuck)
• No-Bake Cookies
• Sandwich Cookies

So you're probably all like, "Why does it matter? Cookies are delicious no matter how they're made!"

And I'm like, "You've obviously never experienced the joy of baking before, dude."

Well, now I'll go into the history of all these types of cookies, and trust me, this won't be boring. :)

Eat a cookie if you DO get bored whilst reading. If not, then stay where you are.

DROP

I'm always thinking about bird turds when someone says 'drop.' I've never been pooped on, thankfully. You know what? Nobody has invented a recipe for Bird Turd Cookies yet. They've got Bird's Nest but not Bird's Turd. There's Unicorn Poo but not Bird's Turd.

What is wrong with this world - clearly something very wrong.

But, hey - who WOULD want to compare their food with body waste?

Actually, food DOES end up becoming waste.

But that's so totally beyond the point. Drop cookies are cookies that are made of firm batter, that is dropped from spoons or fingers onto the cookie sheet. From my experience, drop cookies are fairly frustrating to make, especially if you have a LOT of batter. You're just standin' there, dropping doughball after doughball on the cookie sheet. Believe me, it's not fun after a while. An example of a drop cookie is #everyonesfavorite, chocolate chip.

and yes i will be utilizing multiple hashtags and advanced vocabulary to appear intelligent since first impressions count

Allow me to entertain you with a small yet important piece of history.

The Story of the Chocolate Chip Cookie

Times were hard for everybody living in America at the time of the Great Depression, which began somewhere around the 1930's. Trying to find a good, solid job was comparable to looking for a needle in a haystack. It was nearly impossible for everyone to go to bed with a full stomach. However, during this terrible time, someone used her time wisely. Her name was Ruth Graves Wakefield.

Ruth Graves Wakefield was an innkeeper. She bought an inn, which used to serve as a 'gas station' for travelers in the 1700s. Later, Ruth and her family opened a lodge called the Toll House Inn. Ruth worked as the baker there.

One day, she was making a specific cookie recipe that required baking chocolate. As a substitute, she chopped up a bar of Nestle's semi-sweet chocolate bar. As Ruth mixed the chopped up chocolate bar into the dough, she thought, "I'm a genius! The chocolate will melt whilst these cookies are baking, and they'll turn out just like they would have if I'd had the correct baking chocolate!"

However, her high expectations dropped completely. The chocolate did not melt completely; it held its shape, loudly and proudly, and it dotted each cookie with a promise of deliciousness. News about the new cookie spread like melted chocolate. Nestle's Semi-Sweet Chocolate bar was sold rapidly. And in 1939, Nestle introduced Nestle Toll House Real Semi-Sweet morsels!!

And that is the story of the chocolate chip cookie. Who would've invented them, if Ruth hadn't? Maybe it would be me! ;)

⚜

FUN FACT TIME!! *dramatic Thomas the Train song blares in the background*
Did you know that in the old times, 'round the 1700s, people called cookies 'cakes.'


REFRIGERATOR

Refrigerator cookies are one type I actually enjoy making, which is strange for me because refrigerating takes time and I'm a really impatient person. What do I enjoy about refrigerator cookies?

Well, here's the one and only reason.

I GET TO CUT EM BRO

I remember one of the first times I made a refrigerator cookie. I used the Cocoa Buttons recipe in this book
...

This book has been in our family for years. My mom bought it when we lived in Iowa 14 years ago on November 11. I was 2 years old.

The Cocoa Buttons recipe is on page 17, paired with Poppy Seed Cookies.

I was making this recipe with my mom and my brother one day. The sky was gray and gloomy; we were bored. So we were like, "Hey, let's bake summin'!" So of all recipes, we chose cocoa buttons. We made the dough and rolled it into logs to freeze. The logs we made were definitely not round at all. They looked like... errr... well... like.... (for once I'm lost for words)

Hey, don't blame me. I was probably about 5 or 6 years old. And my brother was 2 years younger.

When we took the 'logs' out of the freezer, we cut them up into 'round' slices and poked holes in them with straws, to resemble buttonholes. Then we put them in the oven.

We took them out. They were burnt (although you couldn't really tell because they were dark brown). They were burnt because they were too small. Our logs should have been thicker. I was sad that they'd burnt.

A few days later, we had some people over. And we still had those cookies. The company took some. I was surprised at him because they tasted really nasty.

I can still remember that moment quite vividly. However, if it had happened to me now, I'd be laughing my bottom off. I wouldn't be sad at all.

Another time I made refrigerator cookies was in 2009. I had borrowed this amazing book from the library...

That girl is so me. #rosedunnington

I loved this book entirely. It was the source of most of the baking knowledge I possess. My favorite section in that book was the one called Cool, Cool Cookies. They're called Cool, Cool for two reasons: They look cool, and they're made of dough that has to be cooled.

The first time I made this was.... with my sister.

Shameful, I know. But she was supposed to protect me from getting burnt.

We made the striped and checkerboard cookies. We used such beautiful pastel colors that my mom's legs went all wiggly. 'Cause that's what they do when she sees colors.

Actually, that's my grandma. Sorry mom!!

My mummy wrote a post on the cookies we made. Eye Candy

You can read it! Don't worry, my mom is equally funny. Just in... a mom way. ;)

And another time I made these cookies was sometime in either 2011 or 2012... let me check.

But the very LAST time I made these was last year, during Ramadan. I was bored, as always. I was taking an online class about Ramadan. And I was hungry. So I thought, "I wanna make cookies!!" So I made an indigo and dark blue version of those shown above. They were utterly delicioso!! I wrote a blog post on them. Horrid Colors And I wrote a blog post of the cookies shown above, too. Cool Sugar Cookies

But let's get to the point. From all these useless experience stories I've wasted much time talking about, you probably have figured out that refrigerator cookies are made like so: The dough is rolled into a log or molded into a box, and then frozen for about 2-3 hours, or for a whole night. After the dough is done chillin', it's taken out of the freezer, cut into slices, and placed on a cookie sheet. And if you're following a recipe that lets you color the dough, you're in for some fun!!

CUTOUT

Another fun type to make!! I've been making cutouts for as long as I can remember. The last time I made some was.... er, sometime in May or April. April, I think.

Cutout cookies are what they sound like. Just make some dough, roll it out, and start making furious cuts all over. It's simple! And after baking, all the cookies look the same. It's so neat!!

#andthatsbasicallyit
#awkwardsilence
#notmuchtosayaboutcutouts

SHAPED/MOLDED

These cookies are a pain to make, but it's a fun pain. These are easy to explain. Just make some dough, mold it into something like your brother's head, and put it on the sheet. Fun, huh! Last time I made these was sometime in April, March, or May.

Wow, I have too many last times.

Anyway, I was making Brown Sugar Cookies with my sister. The dough was udderly delicious. Couldn't help myself in taking a bit. ;) Here's a video of the first time I made them. This video is an epic fail and an utter embarrassment, so I recommend watching it only if you want to make these. However, if you know me and you watch the video, don't you dare get back at me to make me feel even more terrible. If you do so, I'm going to turn you into a cookie.

Which, after some pondering, doesn't seem that bad.

Brown Sugar Cookies - MYARTNF
#epicfail #dontwatchthis #embarrassing

One time, my brother made some shaped cookies from that Ultimate Cookie Book I showed you earlier. He made the shortbread melts, which are on pages 96 and 97. These are utterly delicious, so you can go and make some now and stop reading all this.

Just kidding. I said to stay here.

FILLED & GARNISHED

Ah. Filled and garnished cookies.

I don't have much experience with these, for one reason: They're complicated. However I do remember one time I was making cookies with my sister. After they were done baking, we frosted them with pink and green frosting and sprinkles. They LOOKED amazing. But guess what? We tried 'em, and they tasted 100% awful. Know why? We mixed up the sugar with SALT.

I mean, who DOES that?!

Well, it was an honest mistake. We were young.

I one time made thumbprint cookies with my grandmother when she visited from overseas. I don't remember it much. That's all I can say.

And this is all I can say about filled and garnished cookies.

⚜

Arright, I'm sorry to say, but I'm going to have to end here. Writing about those other cookies would take the whole rest of the day, and I've been writing for hours. Don't worry, inshaaAllah I'll continue this post tomorrow.

I hope you enjoyed this, and please share! Thank you for reading!!

NOW you can go make something.

SOURCES
Chocolate Chip Cookie
Cookie Types

(Surprising huh. All that talk and only two sources? XD)


Happy baking!

N

Different Types of Ovens

Aren't they all pretty much the same thing? Same function, different appearance? Well, true about the appearance, but certain ovens do not share the same functions. The microwave is an oven. It usually reheats food like cold pizza, cold soup, and cold leftover cake from a party last night that you didn't get to go to and your brother had to bring you some but he came home too late and you were sleeping by the time he returned so he put the cake in the fridge and plus he didn't cover it so the cake got kind of hard.  The normal, everyday oven cooks more advanced foods, like cake, chicken, pizza, and cookies. It actually COOKS them. The microwave just reheats cold foods. The stove serves as an alternative to the microwave. But stoves today are out of the question.

What are the different types of ovens?
 
There are quite a few types of modern ovens... (and let's change the fonts for fun...)

• Conventional Oven
• Convection Oven
• Microwave Oven
• Toaster Oven

Which is the best? Let the judging begin!

Yes, for once, do judge.

~

CONVENTIONAL
A conventional oven is designed with two heating elements: baking and broiling. Another name for the conventional oven is the thermal or radiant oven. 'Radiant' comes from the radiation in the oven walls, which the oven relies on because it has no fans. Cooks have complained about this oven, saying it scorches the food's bottoms (ow) and doesn't brown the tops evenly (my, the injustice!). Why is this? The temperature is not the same over the course of the cooking time.

CONVECTION
A convection oven is a oven that has fans to circulate air around food. Convection ovens create a uniform temperature with internal fans that circulate hot air evenly. These ovens are usually more expensive than radiant ovens, but they cook food faster, at a lower temperature, and usually the results are awesome. The fans in the oven make sure that the same temperature reaches the top and bottom foods, and the foods at all the rack levels. Other names for this oven are European, true, turbo, or fan. The fans in a convection oven are really handy. In comparison to conventional ovens, which have no fans, convection ovens are more ideal for purchase, guaranteed five-star results, with only the price as a downside. Buy one now, at only $266.99! (Lol, wut.)

~FUN FACT TIME~
*dramatic childish music*

Food tends to cook more evenly when air is blown onto it, rather than air around it.

MICROWAVE
Everyone's laziness tool. Guess what. They aren't very good to use, healthwise. Microwave ovens cook food by hitting it with electromagnetic radiation.

[Mike Rowayve says microwaves are used for reheating foods, mainly. Sometimes, this girl mixes strange brown stuff in a mug and gives it to him to cook. Mike thinks it isn't healthy, but it smells good. And sometimes, he makes it fail, so that she won't eat it and become unhealthy.] #browniesinamug #mugbrownie #unhealth #mikerowayve

TOASTER
My brother's breakfast used to be cooked in this thing. But we sold that. A toaster oven is basically like a microwave, but it looks more like your everyday oven. And it toasts things. It cooks things set on a timer, like a microwave. Unlike a microwave, toaster ovens have the ability to make foods crispy and brown.

~

I think we have a convection oven, because our baked goods always turn out right. If they turn out wrong, it's our fault. Sometimes that's obvious. Other times we need to dig into the science.


-N-

Vanilla Buttermilk Cupcakes

These were heavenly white things with round tops straight from the oven. I used this recipe.

They were sooo good. May consider making them again tomorrow.

I used Alcohol-Free vanilla extract.

 They were a little dense, though. I believe this is because I kind of overmixed it while trying to find the muffin tin. Also I let it set a little while I was putting in the paper liners. If you want light, fluffy muffins, you can't overmix the batter. I suppose that's why in muffin recipes the first thing you do is line the muffin tin, along with preheating the oven.

Other than that, these muffins were perfect.

-N-

Buttermilk Lemon Cake

I'm sick of the word buttermilk.

Yesterday, I made a buttermilk lemon cake. I think it failed because I didn't use liquid buttermilk.

Well, the cake didn't exactly fail, but it was really crumbly. AND, I forgot about the glaze I was supposed to make with a leftover 1 tablespoon of lemon extract. So I used all five tablespoons of lemon extract. The batter was really runny, so I put in about a cup of flour. When it was mixed to an approvable consistency, I poured it in the cake pan.

And guess what?! I mixed up baking powder with baking soda!! Not physically mix. I mean I got confused with those two. The recipe asked for baking soda, and I measured baking powder instead.

Oh. My. Cake.

But the cake didn't fail.

Does that seem like a lie now because there aren't any pictures?

Well. The cake was asking for a few cuts before it felt like coming out of the pan. It was so yellow and pretty. And the yellow part is sooo good. CITRUS CAKES ARE AMAZING!!! I wonder what would happen if I tried lime. Add an extra 1/4 cup of sugar?

Anyway, to the buttermilk problem. The recipe asked for 1 1/4 cups buttermilk. Well, if four tablespoons of powder buttermilk and one cup of water equal to one cup of buttermilk, then 4 T buttermilk + 1/2 tsp buttermilk and 1 1/4 cup of water should equal 1 1/2 cups buttermilk.

That's exactly what I did, and that's what made the batter runny! Too much water!!

I'm not quite sure if I did the measurements right, even. Two teaspoons equal 1 tablespoon, right? Or is it four?

Oh. It's three. I sees my mistake.

Well, there's my report on Buttermilk Lemon Cake!!

-N-