Cookies are the Gems of Heaven

You know how you see cheap donuts on sale at the store sometimes and you're like...

And your parents are like...

And you're just like...

ANYWAY, here's a continuation of the post from yesterday. We left off at Filled and Garnished Cookies. Next on the list is... Bar Cookies! I prefer to call them bars. I just like that word. It's so... barzzzzy. I mean, you feel me?

No?

Yes?

Maybe?

A little bit?

#itsokaytofeelsadsometimes
#danieltiger

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BAR

To be honest, I never did know whether to call brownies 'cakes' or 'cookies.' According to my research, (#dorothyann #magicschoolbus) brownies, blondies, and other goodies in that area are cookies shaped like bars. Does that explain why they're so good? hehe

The way bar cookies are made is simple. Just make some nice thick batter, pour it into a square or rectangular pan, and bake it. After the pan is taken out and cooled completely, or maybe not completely if someone's impatient, the contents are cut into little squares, or rectangles if you like to be fancy [and greedy muahahah].

Bar cookies are made another way, too. They aren't made just out of batter. They're sometimes made by pressing ingredients into a pan, and then baked and cooled and cut. I remember watching a cooking show on TV about someone making granola bars. [It was Barefoot Contessa. Rate this post as 'Amazing' if you've seen that show.] So anyway, that Barefoot lady made a rather nasty mixture of oats, honey, dried cranberries, dried apricots, and dates, and she preseed it into a pan. Then she cooked it. It was pretty cool. But if she'd used other ingredients I would have enjoyed the show more. (Considering the fact that I did not like the entire show itself overall.)

I once made butterscotch brownies/bars. The recipe was in that Ultimate Cookie book I showed you in the other post. They turned out WONDERFULLY. #nosarcasm

So, yeah. There you go. The re-bar-kable way bar cookies are made. Actually, lemon bars are a type of bar cookie. First a shortbread crust is made, pressed into a pan, and cooked. Then a lemon custard thing is made, poured over the crust, and cooked again. Then powdered sugar falls from the sky onto the finished product, and there you go. It's like cheesecake!! ^_^

Well that was cheesy.

Are you sitting are your computer/laptop, reading this in this state?

I suggest you go get a cookie or something before your head falls down.

What did the cookie say to the other during a fighting match?

"You're one tough cookie!"

#cheesyjokes

There was once a dude named Graham Crocker who was all about baked goods. Everywhere he went he saw cakes, cookies, donuts, and other things that no doubt make anyone's mouth water. Well, one say he went to the playground. Someone came to him and said, "Hey, you! Want to try the monkey bars?" Graham's eyes lit up. Monkey bars!! Were they a mix of monkey bread and some type of bar? It sounded delicious! He couldn't wait to try it out. "Why, sure!" he said.

#evencheesierjokes

Alright, done. Are you sitting a little straighter now? Good, because I'm about to talk about som'n else, you small-fry.

FRIED

So... wait, did you say FRIED COOKIES?! Who woulda thunka sucha thing bruh.

Don't worry, fried cookies are good. Just.... oily. :D

Fried cookies are primarily made and consumed by Jewish/Polish people. (Not intended to offend anyone!! You can't go wrong with good food!) They are fried dough, usually sprinkled with powdered sugar. Sounds good! Speaking of such, have any of you non-existent blog readers ever eaten a funnel cake or a churro? They're cakes of Dutch origin, made similarly. I've never had a funnel cake, but I've had churros two times that I recall. Last year I had some during a bake sale hosted by me and the Girls Club. At home, my mom was making some, and we were helping. Making churros isn't very easy. But it's kind of fun! So, after all the churros were done, we tried the ones that failed. They were like heaven. Airy, soft, crunchy at first bite. Kudos to whoever thunk up such a goodie!! After we finished all the bad ones, I wanted to have another because they're irresistible, like Flipz pretzels. But my mom said no, they're for the bake sale. I was like

And we sold those heavenly things without much trouble. It was a dollar for two, I think.

NO-BAKE COOKIES

I really think these should not be called cookies. Since they're no-bake, then they're not cookies. They're... fake cookies. Maybe they should be renamed to freezies, or easies, or #easyfreezymakewhenaintnobodygotnotime treats.

Anyhow, what are No-Bakes? D'uh. What they sound like. Cookies that require no baking. These usually don't require eggs or anything intolerable when raw. For example, Rice Krispies treats. All you need is some marshmallows, rise krispy cereal, a fridge, and lots of patience. I actually tried to make one once. But since marshmallows have gelatin in them and I didn't have any halaal marshmallows, I used PEANUT BUTTER!! It's stiff, holds together, and is yummy. I don't remember how it turned out but I ate it.

You don't need a fridge for these. Some no-bakes are completed with time and nothing but time.

This section is short, so how'bout this?

Any of you can easily do this at home. Why not make it for an upcoming event and show me in a video response or blog post? I would be so enchanted.

Phew! Last on the list are Sandwich Cookies!

SANDWICH

I remember a regretful day when I brought homemade Oreos to the masjid [mosque] for a halaqa. Regretful, why? I actually have no idea. Forget what I said. It was just.... a typical Saturday afternoon, where the sky was horrible and gray, and the wind was furious. Me and my sister made....... dun dun dun dun!!

No, we made oreos, not dun dun dun dun.

I think I have the link to the recipe we used, but right now I'm under suspense 'cause something's on the stove. So, later, I'll try to find the link and put it here. By the way, that gray stuff in the first picture is my skirt. Lol that oreo in the first picture at the bottom looks like it's screaming, "YAWL GET OFFA ME!"

Other than that, it looks like it's cackling.

Oh gosh, I just realized how long I've been typing and I haven't even explained what sandwich cookies are yet. Well, it's quite simple. Two cookies separated yet connected by some type of filling. I made ice cream sandwiches once. They were delectably delightfully decadently delicious.

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So it seems we've come to a closing here, since I have told you all about 9 types of cookies. These are basics, but there are many, many more. Too many to count and eat.

If I have said anything incorrect, please let me know.

Thanks!

SOURCES
Types of Cookies
All Types of Cookies
No-Bake Cookies
Oreo Cookie Recipe

Happy eating, thanks for reading! I've gotta check the stove

N

[Edited on 15 Aug 2014, 4:23 PM]